The way of the peaceful volunteer leader

 

If you are passionate about volunteering, you are in the right job. If you lead with authenticity, you are in the right job. If you trust yourself keep doing so. No one is perfect. The expert has nothing more to give and nothing more to learn. Keep learning. Mistakes are opportunities. If you are trying to save or fix people you are in the wrong job. If you see instead that you are enabling and inspiring positive action for change, compassion and love, you are in the right job.

If you appreciate your role, whatever its title and feel appreciated by the organisation that you work with, you are in the right job. Practice gratitude every day.

If you do not set boundaries you are heading for burn out. You have a right to have boundaries. We all do. A boundary is not a negative thing. They are a right for your self-care and psychological safety. If you are an effective volunteer leader, have subject matter expertise or are willing to get to that point with a sense of openness, curiosity or learning you do not have to prove your worth to anyone. You are worthy as a human being no matter what is happening in your life right now. You should have got your job based on your worth anyway. You work for an organisation. You are not owned by an organisation.

There are many things that you are capable of changing but there are things that you may never be able to change where you work. Either accept the things you cannot change or seek out another opportunity in another organisation. In your bid to make changes for the betterment of others, do it as your authentic self, without fear and saunter.

Be honest about how you feel with yourself. If your workplace is one of psychological safety be honest with others. Do not let anger or bitterness cloud your honesty. Demonstrate your honesty. Lean into vulnerability. Show the people you lead and work with your humaneness. Know when it’s time to go. Don’t be used or played.

Do not let people dictate how you feel and neither do the same to others. Trust your intuition. Know the difference between empathy and sympathy. That person that annoys you, that person who does not listen to you, that person that does not make you feel validated – do not allow them rent space in your head. Only you know how you truly feel. Just look into your heart and know yourself.

If people do not understand you or your motives despite explaining it to them several times cease explaining yourself. Be authentic, caring, and mindful and you will attract others of the same ilk. Those are your tribe. If you don’t have them where you are, you go find them because they are there.

Relationships end. Jobs end. You may find yourself in a great place now with other great leadership in your organisation. Nothing under the sky is permanent. We are here for a short time. Ponder that. You are always replaceable. Ponder that. Life has its ups, downs, swings and roundabouts. But know that your authentic self is not replaceable ever. Accept and surrender to the importance of life and let it go. Let go of that which does not serve you. Shakespeare said that life is a stage, and we are merely its actors. I say that you are the director of this play. Write your own script. Fill your play with authentic love and compassion. Write scenes of joy, lightness and playfulness. Visualise your future and feel you are there every day. Do not give up. Let go yes, but that is not giving up. Seasons do not last. Reasons do not last. As Marianne Williamson said, understand that what is not love is a cry for love. Feel the pain and be alive again.

 Do not over commit or over promise. Especially if you do not have the time to meet these commitments. It is ok to say no. Don’t be that yes person all of the time. It will eventually catch up with you. Say yes and commit to yourself, your worth, your unique talents and as the Desiderate proclaims “You are a child of the universe. You have the right to be here and whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt, the universe is unfolding as it should….be cheerful. Strive to be happy. “

Return to yourself. There is no other you in this world. You are unique and deserve the best. Be kind. Stay curious. Stay open and keep learning on this wonderful path. And if you like, choose the path less travelled.

This is just an opinion piece. But it is written from a place of compassion and authentic I.

“The opposite of love is not hate; it is use. Use is the abuse of love; in fact, it betrays love. When we use another person, we place their needs below our own, but worse yet, we place their value and dignity below ours.”
― Leah Darrow,